


The Voices in My Head (in my heart)

by Mohnblume



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:33:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28492437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mohnblume/pseuds/Mohnblume
Summary: Kara hears a voice in her head and thinks it's a new power. She couldn't be more wrong, and thus begins her friendship with the best friend she's ever had.
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 16
Kudos: 198





	The Voices in My Head (in my heart)

Kara is 16 when it happens for the first time. She’s only been on Earth for three years, and her English has only just gotten to some level of fluency. 

_I wish she’d love me._

The voice startles her. Kara had been sitting in the bedroom she shared with Alex, who still has yet to really warm up to her, and nearly falls out of her bed. It’s a nice voice, Kara thinks, with a lilting accent she will later learn is Irish. The voice seems sad, though, and Kara’s heart instinctively clenches.

Now, Kara has just begun to learn about her powers, and as her cousin is the only other member of her species alive, there’s not much information out there. She knows that Kal has super hearing, and decides that she must have accidentally heard someone speaking. Even so, she can’t help but respond in her own thoughts, out of solidarity. 

_I’m sure she loves you just the way you are,_ she responds, because she has been taught to be kind above all else. 

The voice now sounds scared.

_Hello? What, no. Am I going crazy? I’m going crazy._

It must be a new power then, telepathy. She’s read about some species having the ability to read minds, and perhaps it’s just another gift from Earth’s yellow sun. 

_You’re not going crazy, don’t worry. I’m Kara, what’s your name?_

The voice is quiet for a few seconds, and for those moments, Kara is worried that she’s scared her away. It somehow feels like a loss, and that’s something Kara knows all too well. She’s relieved when the soft lilting voice answers timidly back. 

_I’m Lena. Did my mother send you to torture me?_

Kara is appalled. Who is this Lena girl, and why would her mother want to hurt her?

_No, of course not! I just want to help. You seem sad._

_I’m used to it. It’s okay._

Lena still sounds sad, but she doesn’t know what to say, so she stays quiet. Lena doesn’t say anything back either. 

…

It’s weeks later, when Kara sees Kal again. She hasn’t heard anything from Lena again, which is sad, but she doesn’t exactly know how to use her new power. It doesn’t feel the same as her super hearing or her x-ray vision.

So, she asks her cousin, hoping that he can explain more about it and she can check in on the sad girl.

“Kal, how do I activate my telepathy?” she asks him, eager to learn more about her powers from her superhero cousin.

He eyes her strangely. “We can’t read minds, Kara. And please call me Clark. It’s for everyone’s safety.”

It’s an old argument, but Kara doesn’t respond, too busy thinking about her mysterious girl. She still finds half a second to be annoying with her cousin for taking away his one connection with their homeland. She hates calling him Clark.

“But, I spoke to someone. She sounded so clear in my head,” Kara protests.

Kal shrugs. “Maybe you accidentally used your super hearing. Which reminds me, I brought these for you.” He pulls out a pair of simple black glasses. “They’re lead lined, and they’ll block some of your powers. Makes it easier to blend in with the humans.”

Kara takes the glasses, trying not to crush them in her frustration. “I wasn’t using my enhanced hearing. And even if I was, she spoke back to me.”

But Kal only tilts his head, his gaze far away. “Sorry, Kara, there’s a robbery. I need to go.”

She watches him take to the skies, sadness in her eyes. It’s always like this with Kal. He comes for a few minutes, but has to rush off to save the world. She understands that he’s a hero, but he’s her only family now, and it stings. 

Sighing, she heads back home. On foot, because her adoptive mother and Kal were very clear that she’s not to use her powers.

As she’s walking, she decides to call out to Lena in her mind. Maybe if she thinks hard enough, the other girl will hear her. 

_LENA? HEY, LENA!_

To her great surprise and pleasure, Lena does respond. She sounds a little annoyed, but it’s better than the heavy sadness of before.

_Kara? Why are you yelling? I’m in class._

That confirms that she’s probably around Kara’s own age, if she’s still in school. 

_Class? But it’s evening!_

There’s a strange feeling, as Lena is laughing. 

_No, it’s the morning for me. I’m in physics now._

And oh. That’s strange. 

_Where are you from, exactly?_

Kara had briefly learned about time zones, but since arriving on Earth, she’d never met anyone from another state, let alone another country. Midvale was fairly small and isolated. 

_I’m from Metropolis, but I go to school in Ireland. I was born here, though. Where are you from?_

_Midvale!_

Lena hasn’t heard of it, and since she’s still in class, that’s the end of their little conversation. Still, it’s the best she’s felt in a while. It’s comforting to know that she can still contact this Lena person whenever she wants. She still feels safe talking to Lena, somehow she trusts the other girl, despite not knowing her yet. It could just be the telepathy, but it feels like she really connects with her. 

Kara doesn’t mention her new power, or Lena to anyone after that. If they’re not going to believe her, she’s not going to fight with them. Besides, she doesn’t want her new family or Kal to make her stop talking to Lena. 

It’s like the best friend she’s never had. Even when Alex begins to warm up to her and she finds friends at school. Lena’s kind and gentle, and she never judges Kara for not understanding idioms or taking things too literally. She’s constant, and it’s reassuring in a way that nothing has been since Kryton. 

…

When Kara is finishing her last year of high school, she comes out to Lena. As Kryptonian; she had already come out as pansexual when Lena had a sexuality crisis last year.

They’re talking, as they normally do after school. Lena graduated early, so she’s already almost done with her first bachelor’s degree. She’s been tutoring Kara in biology, because it’s one of the only science subjects that makes no sense to the blonde. Organic life here is different than on Krypton. 

_So you see, that’s how the cells reproduce._

Kara hums as she nods, something she’s begun doing since the other girl can’t see her. 

_It’s all so different than what I’ve learned._

_Different, how?_

It’s been a while since Kal or her adoptive family has had to give her a lecture on sharing her secret heritage. It’s also been a while since Kara has debated telling Lena who she is. She would have done it last year, but after notorious Lex Luthor nearly killed her cousin, she’s been more careful. 

Lena had actually taken the news harder than Kara. The other girl had refused to talk about the Luthors, and Lex in particular seemed to strike a sore spot with her. Kara wondered if they knew each other. 

Even so, Lena has been nothing but supportive of aliens and their rights. She’s something of a genius, that much is clear. So, she’s been developing different prototypes to help aliens hide their identities and other gadgets that make life easier for extraterrestrials. Kara decides that it’s time to tell Lena who she really is. She doesn’t like that her closest friend has no idea who she really is. 

_It’s...hey Lena? Can I tell you something?_

_If it’s that you can eat 15 hot dogs in one sitting, I already know._

Kara giggles. It’s adorable really, how Lena’s defense mechanism is always sarcastic quips. It puts her at ease, and she doesn’t notice the nervous tension from the other girl.

_Okay, so you can’t tell anyone. I mean, I don’t know who you’d tell, and we haven’t even met anyway. I’m just rambling now, but anyway, there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you, Lena._

_Kara, don’t--_

Lena interrupts her, and her voice seems more urgent than normal, but Kara pays her no mind. She just barrels ahead, because she’s never done this before and she wants to say it before she loses her nerve.

_I’m Kryptonian. My whole planet exploded, and I was sent to Earth with my cousin Kal-El. Only I got stuck in the Phantom Zone and he grew up with Earth parents. So now I’m here and I have all these powers, but I’m not allowed to use them._

Kara knows she’s babbling again, but she can’t find it in her to care. It’s so relieving to finally tell something, to finally tell Lena, who she’s been talking to for nearly two years.

But then, it occurs to her that Lena isn’t responding.

_Lena?_

There’s a pause, and for a few moments, Kara fears that she’s somehow lost her best friend. 

_Kara, you can’t--don’t--no one can know we know each other, okay? Don’t tell anyone you know me._

The intensity of Lena’s voice scares Kara. She might have expected a bit of disbelief, or even awe, but not this. Lena sounds scared. 

_Hey, hey, what’s going on?_

Kara tries to make her voice sound as soothing as possible, trying not to let her panic seep into her voice. She’s not sure how well she succeeds, though, because Lena’s next words sends a chill down her spine. 

_I’m a Luthor, Kara. I’m a Luthor and you can’t tell anyone we’ve talked._

It’s the last she’ll hear from the other girl for days. Five days, in fact. Five long days of radio silence from her best friend. 

Not for lack of trying. She still says good morning and good night every day. She also still periodically updates Lena with anecdotes from her life. She knows Lena will still hear her, even if she doesn’t respond. 

On the fifth day, Kara is in the middle of a riveting story about her history teacher, when Lena interrupts her. 

_Kara, can you please wait 30 minutes to continue this story?_

Her voice is tense, and it immediately shuts the blonde up. She had been laying in her bed, but after hearing Lena, she bolts upright and looks at her phone. She sets a timer for 30 minutes and waits. 

It’s probably the longest half hour that Kara has ever waited. Each minute stretches out, and it feels like hours later that her phone dings. 

_Lena? Is everything okay? It’s been 30 minutes._

There’s a brief pause before the other girl answers.

_I didn’t literally mean 30 minutes, but yes. Thank you. You may carry on._

Alex has been teaching Kara to take things less literally, so she makes a mental note to remember that times aren’t usually meant literally. She then proceeds to finish up her story about her history teacher. 

It’s silent after she concludes her tale. Kara waits another few seconds to make sure that Lena isn’t going to respond, before asking another question. 

_Hey, is everything okay? Did you need to concentrate? I hope you weren’t taking a test and I distracted you!_

After another lengthy pause, Kara begins to think that Lena is just not going to answer her ever again. But then, her voice comes again. 

_Yes, I did need to concentrate. I need my full mental capacity when I speak to my mother._

Kara frowns. 

_That doesn’t sound very nice._

Lena’s responding voice is dry. 

_It’s not. We’re Luthors. We don’t do nice._

Kara finds this fact sad. She knows more about the Luthor family now, of course she does. She’s used Lena’s previous silence to look up the girl, and while there isn’t really much about Lena herself, there’s plenty about her family. 

She knows that they’re seen as harsh and ruthless, and the family is richer than some countries. She knows about Lex, and his hatred of Superman and all aliens. She knows that Lena is adopted, but that Lena’s biological father is Lionel. That fact had actually taken some digging, and an unauthorized trip to the DEO, an agency she wasn’t supposed to know about. She doesn’t know if Lena knows that, but she doesn’t know how to ask without incriminating herself and revealing a secret government agency. 

_I think you’re pretty nice._

But that’s the thing. After all her digging, Kara couldn’t bring herself to include Lena in the same group as the rest of the Luthors. Lena, somewhere between becoming her best friend and smartest person she knows, has also become the kindest person she knows. She’s the kind of person who rescues kittens from ditches, messing up her own clothes and getting into trouble with her parents. She’s the kind of person who sits with the lonely kids at lunch, not out of pity, but out of genuine interest to get to know them. She’s the kind of person to still see the best in people, even after they prove time and time again that they can be cruel and spiteful. 

And maybe it’s her unending optimism, or her budding love for her best friend, but Kara really is’t prepared for when Lena responds to her in the saddest voice she’s ever heard. 

_I wish I was nice. I wish I knew what nice was._

It’s heartbreaking. 

_Why don’t you think you can be nice? I want to be nice to you. You can always count on me to be nice, Lena. I’ll show you._

Lena doesn’t answer for a long time. When she does, her voice is soft, barely a whisper. 

_Thank you, Kara._

**Author's Note:**

> This has been sitting in my drafts for about three months now and I have about six other stories i'm working on, one of which is a multichapter work. I just needed to get something out there so I can get my motivation to continue writing back. This is probably not finished, and I have part of the next chapter written already. I make no promises though, so I'm going to keep it at one chapter for now. 
> 
> Anyways, thank you for reading, and feel free to ignore my ramblings. Happy New Year everybody!


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